


ocean eyes

by klarfire



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Developing Relationship, Domestic, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Oblivious Neil Josten, Post-Canon, Smut, only a little angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-29
Updated: 2018-12-29
Packaged: 2019-09-30 01:32:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17214506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/klarfire/pseuds/klarfire
Summary: Andrew shoved him into the wall and kissed him hard on the mouth. „You can't even lose in a fucking board game,“ he murmured against his lips and kissed him again, „Junkie.“these are just little excerpts from their life together! (and a special one at the end <33)





	ocean eyes

**Author's Note:**

> hi! english isn't my native language, so there might be mistakes. sorry! hope you will enjoy <33

Single rays of sunshine shone through the curtains. Neil slowly opened his eyes and blinked against the abrupt brightness, a small wrinkle formed on his forehead. He looked beside him and saw nothing but blond hair lying on the pillow and a closed pair of eyes whose eyelashes gently touched the slightly reddened cheeks.  
  
Neil carefully got out of bed, even though he knew Andrew would wake up anyway as he would no longer feel Neil's familiar body weight next to him on the mattress.  
  
He sneaked into the bathroom and stopped in front of the sink to pour cold water on his face.  
  
After a few minutes Andrew slowly slipped into the bathroom, too. His blond hair was a ruffled mess Neil would love to bury his fingers in. Andrew stopped behind Neil, lightly pressed his face into Neil's shoulder and took a deep breath.  
  
Neil smiled to himself and thoughtlessly grabbed his toothbrush, but stopped and instinctively frowned. He was confused.  
  
„Where is your toothbrush?“ Neil asked but Andrew ignored him, his nose now by the little hairs in Neil’s nape. The fact that Andrew was so eloquent early in the morning and had hardly a word to say would probably never change.  
  
After half a minute Neil was almost convinced that Andrew dozed off behind him, his head still resting on Neil's shoulder. But then he suddenly felt warm lips gently touching his skin.  
  
„I can't find my toothbrush since a few days.“  
  
Neil frowned. How can a toothbrush disappear?  
  
„That’s really weird, don’t you think?“ Neil asked.  
  
Andrew mumbled something Neil couldn't exactly decipher.  
  
"Does that mean you've never brushed your teeth the last few days?“  
  
Andrew scoffed, "It's not like we don't have a toothbrush at all anymore." It wasn't until Neil realized what Andrew was pointing to that he slowly turned around.  
  
"You used mine?“  
  
Andrew stared at him, a small grin played around his lips. „Problem?“  
  
Neil would never think of using a toothbrush other than his. But he wouldn't be extremely reluctant to take Andrews if there was no other choice. After all, they kissed and did _stuff_. The thought was just so unusual for him because he just never thought about it. But in the end he couldn't care less.  
  
„No,“ Neil said. And after a moment, "But that still doesn't explain where yours is?“  
  
Andrew shrugged and took Neil's toothbrush out of his hand. "I'll buy a new one later.“  
  
——  
  
Neil soon had to admit to himself that it was a stupid idea to play with Nicky, Matt, Kevin and Aaron Monopoly. Normally Neil liked board games but Monopoly wasn't one of them. He found that it had much more to do with luck and less with logical thinking whether one would win or lose.  
  
As usual Andrew wasn't playing and sat in a chair, leaning with it against the wall. With two fingers he kept tapping on the edge of his glass and watched them with a bored expression.  
  
„Neil, you have to give me 200!“ Nicky shouted happy. He had absolutely no mercy at this game. But Neil noticed that even in Kevin’s eyes you could find a little bit joy and gleam and that was rare, since his only joy was almost exclusively Exy.  
  
Neil just snorted and gave Nicky his money and passed the dice to Matt. Both of them only owned a few small properties while for example Kevin had almost every other square under his control and was demanding rent whenever Neil or Matt moved.  
  
Neil was irritated and could feel Andrew rolling his eyes next to him. But he didn't look at him, he wanted to concentrate on the game and maybe not lose in the end.  
  
Unfortunately it didn't take long until the inevitable happened and Neil defeated. He stood, pouting, and went to the kitchen to fill his glass with more soda.  
  
When he came back Nicky laughed, „Don’t be sad, Neil. We can’t all be good at board games!“  
  
Neil grunted, „I'm usually always good but not in this dumb game.“  
  
„Stop being annoying,“ Aaron scoffed and stood up, „I’m ordering chinese. Who wants some?“  
  
Nicky and Kevin lifted their arms above their heads while Neil shook his head, still irritated. Since Andrew said nothing, Aaron gave him a quick look with his eyebrows raised.  
  
„Pass,“ Andrew said. „I already ate.“  
  
„A box of chocolatechip ice cream doesn’t count as a real meal,“ Nicky muttered and Andrew glared at him. Aaron rolled his eyes and left the room, already dialing the number into his phone.  
  
Andrew drained his glass and then stood, walking out the door and back to their room. Neil followed immediately, still grunting about the unsatisfied game. When he entered their bedroom and closed the door behind him, there were suddenly hands on his hips.  
  
Andrew shoved him into the wall and kissed him hard on the mouth. „You can't even lose in a fucking board game,“ he murmured against his lips and kissed him again, „Junkie.“  
  
Neil huffed and fighted not to smile, „Well, they definitely cheated so..“ he said and placed a few kisses along Andrew’s shoulder to his neck. He could literally feel how Andrew relaxed under his lips.  
  
Andrew didn’t answer, just turned his face to him and tilting his chin up, kissing Neil hungrily. „I can’t believe you are such a sore loser.“  
  
Neil narrowed his eyes but when Andrew took his wrist and pressed a kiss into his palm, the frown vanished immediately. Their body’s were pressed together, Andrew kissing hungrily every inch of skin that Neil revealed.  
  
After a few more kisses and touches, Andrew glided down on Neil’s body and knelt on the floor, opening Neil’s pants. When his jeans and boxer shorts were quickly taken off, Andrew licked with his tongue over the tip of his dick and then began to take the whole length into his mouth.  
  
Neil groaned, his fingers stroking into Andrew’s blonde hair. He felt that Andrew spread his thighs even more and circled Neil’s hole with a spit wet finger.  
  
Neil screamed and his knees gave in. When he fell, Andrew caught him but the persistent pressure of his fingers and lips didn’t stop.  
  
The position was a bit uncomfortably but a few seconds later, Neil was lying on his back and Andrew lay between his legs. When Neil slowly opened his eyes and looked down at him, Andrew’s gaze was wild and dark with lust.  
  
Neil ran his tongue over his lips while Andrew spoiled him with his skilled licks and touches. He squirmed under him but Andrew immediately grabbed his hips. „Andrew—„  
  
Andrew didn’t answer, suddenly nestling his wet fingers stronger against his hole, slowly began to find the way inwards. Neil’s body was bursting with desire. He clapped his right hand over his mouth to muffle his groans and screams but then he felt Andrew’s hard stare.  
  
„Don’t,“ he said, „I want to hear you.“  
  
Neil felt him shuddering under the same feeling. He could say Andrew’s body was tense with lust and fire, too. His gaze met Neils again, openly hungry, just like his fingers, which gently widened Neil more and more.  
  
„Fucking God,“ Neil said in a hoarse voice. Andrew kissed his lips, suddenly above him. He took Neil’s fingers and pressed it against his dick, which made Neil gasped for breath.  
  
Neil clumsily opened the zipper of his jeans and finally slipped his fingers into Andrew’s shorts. He loved the feeling of Andrew’s hot weight on his palm. Andrew’s breathing got quicker and his mouth lightly opened. He grabbed a handful of Neil’s strands of hair and looked in his eyes with amazement.  
  
Suddenly Andrew’s lips were on his and they explored their mouths with greedy tongues. Andrew pushed into Neil’s hand just as Neil thrusted back on Andrew’s fingers.  
  
„Come,“ Neil weakly whispered and Andrew grunted, pressing his fingers deeper in Neil, which made Neil come fast and hard and loud. He clung to Andrew’s shoulder and held him in his arms as Andrew exploded, shouting hoarsely into Neil’s hot and sweaty neck.  
  
After a few minutes, Neil came back to earth and his breathing calmed down again. „The evening wasn't a flop after all, huh?“  
  
„Shut up,“ Andrew said quietly but Neil could feel him fighting a smile at his neck.  
  
——  
  
When shopping for food, their paths often separated as soon as they entered the grocery store. Andrew always got his candy, especially ice cream and chocolate, and Neil... the rest.  
  
As Neil stood in front of the shelves of various rice varieties, a body suddenly came close to him and stopped next to him. Neil slowly looked up and saw a slightly taller boy with short black hair standing beside him.  
  
He smiled, but Neil felt uncomfortable at once because the stranger was strangely close. He slowly took a step aside and the boy next to him laughed.  
  
"Thinking about what kind of rice you want to buy?", he asked.  
  
Neil frowned. Did the boy work here, maybe, and want to advise him? But who will advise you about... rice? Then he looked at the different rice packs that lay in front of him and grabbed a basmati rice package. „No, I’m okay thanks.“  
  
„Mhh,“ the stranger said. „You know exactly what you want, huh?“  
  
Yeah, basmati rice was in fact his usually choice. Neil nodded. „Yes.“  
  
The boy stared a moment at him before he brightly grinned, „Well, do you know any good rice receipts then?“  
  
And oh god, Neil had absolutely no idea about cooking. He usually picked out a recipe from the Internet or simply heated a finished curry coconut sauce.  
  
„Sorry but I—„  
  
He interrupted himself when he suddenly felt fingers on his hip and Andrew stood behind him. "You got everything?"  
  
„Uhm, yeah,“ Neil answered and lifted up his rice pack a little bit.  
  
"Good. Go to the checkout and put the products on the treadmill," Andrew said and then focused his stare at the stranger who was still standing there. "I'll be right behind you.“  
  
Neil nodded, turned and headed towards the cash register. Thank God there wasn't much people and he could put all his stuff down immediately. Andrew appeared after only a few minutes behind him and put his ice boxes on the treadmill as well.  
  
„Everything alright?“ Neil asked.  
  
Andrew ignored him and payed for their food.  
  
When they arrived at their dorm, Andrew pushed him to the wall and kissed him hungry. Neil moaned quietly as their tongues met, and Andrew took him apart piece by piece.  
  
Too quickly Andrew leaned back and left Neil aroused. His eyes were dark as he leaned his forehead against Neil's. "You are so oblivious, Josten."  
  
Neil didn’t unterstand but his frown immediately vanished when Andrew leaned in again, with even more passionate as before.  
  
Whatever it was that caused Andrew not to even put his ice in the freezer. That he wanted Neil right away, that he needed him right away. Neil didn't care. He couldn't care less what it was but he was grateful for it.  
  
——  
  
When Andrew and Rene were sparring longer one evening, Neil was with Matt and Nicky. Aaron was fortunately with Katelyn, as almost every evening.  
  
A few weeks ago they decided to watch the Harry Potter movies. When Nicky found out that Neil had never seen any of them before, he was really saddened and practically pulled him in front of the TV.  
  
Tonight they watched 'Harry potter and the goblet of fire'. Nicky not only once mentioned that the book was much better than the film and also the fourth part the worst of the whole series.  
  
He also constantly gave him background informations that were in the book but not mentioned in the movie itself until he stopped because Matt's sighs got louder and louder.  
  
Neil watched his phone from time to time to see if Andrew had already written him that he was back.  
  
When the movie was done, he stretched his arms, was just ready to got up when Matt turned to him.  
  
"Is Andrew back yet?" Matt asked.  
  
"No, but I think I'll go nonetheless. But I really liked the movie.“  
  
Matt smiled, "If you want, we can start watching the next one.“  
  
"I don't think so. I'd probably fall asleep here.“  
  
"And that would be bad because...?"  
  
Neil felt himself blushing. It was no secret that he and Andrew were together but still it felt strange to explain to his friends why he would want to sleep in their bed, preferably every night. Even though it was a perfectly normal thing in relationships to like to sleep together in a bed.  
  
Since Matt was still looking at him with his eyebrows raised, Neil sighed and weirdly waved his hand. „I just want to sleep with him.“  
  
Matt smiled while Nicky literally screamed and whistled.  
  
„I mean beside him!! Next to him! I didn't mean I want to have sex with him!“ Neil said and regretted immediately what just came out of his mouth. He was probably red like a tomato by now.  
  
„Soo," Nicky grinned, "you don’t want to have sex with him, huh?“  
  
„I’m not saying I don’t want to!! Of course I want to have sex with him. I would enjoy it a lot. I have enjoyed what we have but I don’t want it tonight. I just.. I didn't imply sex. I want just—„  
  
„Neil, please stop,“ Matt pleaded. „I’m getting second-hand embarrassment here.“  
  
„Noo, don’t stop!“ Nicky said. „It just got interesting.“  
  
Neil rolled his eyes while Matt scoffed. „If Andrew was here, he'd strangle you.“  
  
Finally Nicky turned pal and went still. Neil smiled to himself and waved at them before getting out the door.  
  
He knew he wouldn't have sex with Andrew tonight. He knew it was too early to take such a step. He also knew that Andrew and he would walk this path together. That they respected their boundaries. That both exactly knew how far they could go with the other.  
  
But what he liked most was that Andrew had chosen _him _to go that way. To grow with him and create new, better memories.  
  
——  
  
The nightmares were getting less and less every week. But sometimes they still chased Neil and he woke up in the middle of the night, his breath faster than usual. Sometimes even Andrew woke up from it because Neil screamed in a dream or moved too fast as if he was running. But not that night.  
  
He carefully hugged his knees against his stomach and watched Andrew sleep beside him. Neil couldn’t really think and just stared at Andrew, hoping to fall asleep again soon. Which he couldn’t.  
  
Next to him Andrew looked so peaceful. His blanket was wrapped tightly around him, nose buried in his pillow, eyes firm closed. Neil’s thumb wanted to come upward to trace his eyebrows but he refused and bit his lip instead. He didn't want to wake him.  
  
Maybe he should get up and watch television. If he moved carefully and quietly, there would be a good chance not to wake Andrew. But Neil stayed where he was. Something about the sight of Andrew kept him rooted.  
  
His breathing was quiet and even. His blonde hair fell softly over his forehead and Neil fighted the urge to run his fingers through it. His full lips were closed to a thin line which Neil would love to kiss and open with his tongue. He wanted to kiss anything he could reach of Andrew. He wanted—  
  
„Are you going to stare at me all night?“ Andrew muttered with his deep voice and Neil startled. Obviously, he woke Andrew up after all.  
  
„I can't fall asleep anymore,“ Neil said quietly and watched Andrew slowly open his eyes and stretch out an arm.  
  
„Come here,“ Andrew whispered and Neil complied carefully.  
  
„Sorry that I woke you“ he mumbled against his collarbone but Andrew only huffed, „Go back to sleep.“  
  
Andrew held him until he fell asleep again.  
  
When Neil woke up the next morning, it wasn't from the single rays of sunlight flashing through the yellow curtains, but from a eager mouth covering his warm body with kisses and slipping down his body.  
  
Whenever Andrew leaned back for a moment and only rubbed his nose against Neil, inhaling him, Neil longed the feeling of his boyfriend's soft, tender lips on his bare skin.  
  
Meanwhile Andrew was between his legs kissing the inside of his thighs. First the left leg, up and down. Then the same on the right leg until Neil couldn't lie still and sighed softly.  
  
„Andrew,“ Neil quietly said.  
  
Andrew, now just an inch away from Neil’s dick, glanced up and lightly grinned at him.  
  
„What do you want?“ Andrew asked and kissed the tip of Neil’s throbbing dick hungrily.  
  
Neil made a choked sound and felt how dry his mouth already was.  
  
„Can you just— Don’t tease me.“ Neil said and didn’t care how desperate he sound. He felt how Andrew smiled at his sensitive skin and then kissed every inch of Neil’s length with a lot of tongue.  
  
„Asshole,“ Neil half laughed.  
  
„Impatient brat,“ Andrew muttered, which made Neil laugh out loud.  
  
Andrew just kept kissing, licking and teasing him. „You’re insatiable as always.“  
  
After a few more kisses he suddenly took the complete length of Neil’s dick in his mouth. Neil moaned loudly and buried his right hand in Andrew's hair while the other one clutched tightly into the sheet.  
  
Andrew took him fast and dirty and very sloppy and Neil tried to glanced down from time to time. He didn't want to miss this view.  
  
Andrew's pace was constantly fast but always as Neil's dick touched the back of his throat, he stayed for a moment and gave Neil everything he needed.  
  
Neil came with Andrew's name on his lips.  
  
——  
  
After a busy day of important lectures, Neil was relieved when he ran back to his dorm from his last course. Andrew wouldn't be there because he was at Bee's like almost every Thursday with Aaron.  
  
When Neil was in his room, he undressed and took a quick and effective shower. While his frozen pizza was in the oven, he watched the last game of the Trojans and tried to study the steps and moves made by the new players.  
  
After almost half an hour, when he was lying on the sofa, satisfied and full but Andrew had still not returned, he finally went to Matt's dorm. Matt's door was open but when he saw Neil standing in front of him, he frowned slightly.  
  
Even if it was only a minimal confusion, it didn't escape Neil. He spent too much time with Matt not to feel any discomfort from him.  
  
"What?" Neil asked and Matt first carefully observed him before telling him that Aaron came into the apartment very angry and fetched alcohol before disappearing again. It probably hadn't have gone very well with Bee this week.  
  
Slight panic rose in Neil. He was the one who had the idea of the double sessions with the twins. In the hope that they would at least be able to normally talk with each other and could clear up their misunderstandings.  
  
He knew that Andrew could handle himself, more or less, but he still wanted to help him wherever he could. He wanted to be there for him, even if it just meant just sitting and smoking next to him.  
  
He often noticed that both of the twins were very stressed after the hour together with Bee, but it was never so bad that Aaron showed it so openly and obviously required alcohol. The way Matt had told it, it was especially bad today.  
  
Neil went back to his dorm, searched every room but only found Kevin watching an Exy game on his laptop and throwing a pillow at him after Neil opened the door to his room without knocking.  
  
Then he went up to the roof, but there was no sign of Andrew there either.  
  
Neil became nervous. He knew Andrew would come as soon as he was ready. He finally trotted back to Matt's and tried to distract himself with video games. During he looked at his phone, hoping to see Andrew's name flashing. But it showed no sign of Andrew for another half an hour.  
  
Impatiently, he opened the contact himself and wrote him just to be sure. "I'm with Matt. If you need me, write me.“  
  
When he put his phone away, he looked up in Matt’s careful smiling face. „I’m sure he is alright.“  
  
Neil gave him a nod and a weak smile before he took his controller again.  
  
After half an hour there was a knock at the door and Neil literally jumped on his feet. He felt Matt's eyes following him alarmed.  
  
When he opened the door, Andrew stood there with a bored and blank face. Neil carefully closed the door behind him without letting Andrew out of his sight.  
  
„You look scared.“ Andrew said dryly.  
  
Neil said nothing.  
  
„Wow,“ Andrew huffed, „Playing those video games must have been frightening.“  
  
They looked at each other another moment until Andrew reached out his hand in offering. Neil bypassed it and hugged him hard instead. After a few seconds Andrew pushed a curl behind Neil’s ear and kissed his shoulder.  
  
Neil was glad that Andrew's body didn't tense up but leaned immediately against his.  
  
When Neil looked up, Andrew cradled Neil’s face with both of his hands, intense eyes on him.  
  
„Are you—„ Neil started but Andrew shut him up with a firm kiss and Neil whimpered against his lips.  
  
„It’ll be fine,“ Andrew finally said and Neil didn't ask further.  
  
——  
  
Neil was always so happy when Andrew decided to train with him and Kevin. He got better and better in the last months.  
  
Neil found it fascinating that although Andrew had never really made an effort in the last season, he was still good. With minimum effort. He always knew how good he he would be if he practiced with Kevin. He knew that if he invested effort and time in training, he would be the perfect goalkeeper. And so it was. He had so much potential.  
  
He protected the goal as if it was the most important thing for him in the world, especially today when Kevin was particularly merciless.  
  
While Neil watched and admired Andrew, Kevin growled desperately as he never scored a goal. After further misses, he went to the edge of the court for a drink and Andrew suddenly stood in front of Neil. And gave him a bored look.  
  
„Stop staring at me like that.“  
  
And of course Andrew noticed it, even though it seemed he had been concentrating on Kevin for the last thirty minutes.  
  
„Try to stop me.“ Neil said playfully. He knew he smiled stupidly but he couldn’t stop. He also knew that it irritated Andrew. Probably he wondered why _exactly_ Neil was smiling.  
  
It wasn't that Neil never smiled at him like that, but today it lasted longer. He felt how warm he became inside.  
  
Neil turned around and saw that Kevin was on the phone with someone. Then he got up and reached out until his thumb brushed against Andrew's cheek.  
  
„I love you,“ Neil said like it was the most evident thing to say. Andrew didn’t move or speak. Neil knew it was something that Andrew could difficult accept. That he would never return these words to Neil. But that was okay because Neil knew what Andrew felt about him.  
  
Andrew stared at him for another moment. Others would say they couldn't find any emotion in Andrew's face but Neil saw,that he was slightly flustered. A little red around his cheeks and ears.  
  
It almost looked like Andrew was holding his breath.  
  
After a few seconds he cupped Neil’s cheeks with both hands and pressed his lips to Neil’s. Right there on the court, like it was nothing. Like this was always a thing they did.  
  
Neil eagerly kissed him back, but not for long. He knew that Andrew would hate it when Kevin would suddenly appeared next to them.  
  
Still, he took more seconds to stroke his fingers through Andrews' blond hair.  
  
„You are loved,“ Neil whispered when he pulled back. Andrew said nothing. The he slowly pulled his hands back to his side and walked back to the goal.  
  
Kevin reappeared a short moment later and ambitiously put his helmet on while positioning himself.  
  
Neil didn't miss Andrew pressing his fingers against his own lips before picking up his helmet again.  
  
——  
  
While Neil slept quietly beside him, Andrew was wide awake.  
  
He couldn't believe Neil actually said those words to him.  
  
He remembered when Neil asked him in the shower that evening what it really felt like when Neil stared at him like that. Meanwhile, he covered Andrew's neck with kisses, traced his collarbone with his fingertips.  
  
_'What do you really feel when I am looking at you? How does it feel like when I am near you?'_  
  
Andrew didn't answer him, but pulled him up by his hair and pressed their lips together.  
  
**Like I can finally stop hurting.**  
  
He couldn't tell Neil. Not yet. But he knew at some point he'll be ready.  
  
Andrew knew he couldn't fall asleep for the next few more hours. He wondered if he would find any sleep at all this night, because he found three new words that hunted and comforted him at the same time.  
  
**You are loved.**_ _

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!! tell me what you think, no matter what it is! <33


End file.
